Entering a relationship has considerations that will prove its worth.
Self-Introspection. Only you can define yourself; decide whether or not you’re ready for a relationship and the cycles behind it.
Respect. Respect should be mutual and a two-way street. If you can’t respect each other, the relationship won’t work long.
Intimacy. How close are you to each other? How vulnerable can you be without judging each other? Can you trust each other with your secrets? Such questions test your intimacy.
Boundaries. Tied to respect are boundaries. If you can respect your partner, you can appreciate their personal limits. If not, something’s amiss.
Your support system- friends and family. A partner should be an addition to your life, not a subtraction of whoever’s holding your life together.
Life Priorities. Suppose you have too much going on in your life presently to focus on a relationship. In that case, you might want to rethink your priorities. Set yourself up first, then dive right in when you’re settled.
Shared interests and hobbies. Do you have shared interests? If so, great! If not, are you okay with her doing what she does? Is she okay with how you spend your spare time?
Their attitude towards you, your family, friends, and vice versa. How does she treat them? With love and joy, or contempt and disgust? How will you work around that? Also, does she like how you’re viewing her circles?
Their family background. What must you know about the family that will price into your relationship? Do they treat each other okay? Are they separated? How do the parents treat each other?
Past relationships. Is there something from your past relationship that you think could have worked better? What did you learn from it? What worked and what didn’t? The same goes for her; if something from a past relationship might trigger the new one, address it ASAP.
Marriage. Are you serious about your relationship making it to the end of the aisle? Will your partner now be your partner for life? Are you committed to making it to matrimony?
Finances. How do you both approach anything money? Are you investing it, hoarding it, saving for a rainy day, or planning to pay your kid’s tuition with it? Spendthrift or a miser? Will you approve of your partner’s financial habits, and will she reciprocate?
Political Views. Which side do you pick? What policies do you (not) like? Will your opinions affect your partner, and is she okay with them? Also, will you agree with your partner’s political perspectives? Will they affect you?
Gender Roles. Who will do the dishes? Who will wash the laundry? House chores? Who will volunteer to look after the baby today while the other goes to work? Who will pay the bills?
Religious Beliefs. If you’re in an inter-religious relationship, are you okay with her religion, and is she fine with yours? What will your parents think about this? Will they value it? Why or why not?
Careers. What career path do you plan on taking? Will it give you time to be with your partner and your family? Does your partner approve of it? Similarly, do you agree with your partner’s job choice?
Family Planning. Do you plan on raising a family? When do you want to have your first child? How many children? How will you pay for their expenses, tuition, etc.? Are you both comfortable with the idea?
All other life arguments. Life with a partner is not a walk in the park; there will be several uprisings along the way, but your relationship’s strength lies in dealing with the bad days as you would with the good.
What do you think? Anything else to add?
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~Carerra
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